Day 5 - Fussy

So here's a juxtaposition:

1) My two closest men friends are having trouble with their sex drives - i.e. not enough of it.
2) I found out today some other men friends of mine are attending a workshop on sex and relationships this weekend (where, incidentally, they had a very bad experience - reminds me how close to the bone this stuff is and how easy it is to get an incompetent facilitator who simply shames the participants).
3) I'm going really strong and having both a renewed sex drive and some "success" with women (today I had another date with an ex-girlfriend who seems very much reinterested).

So somehow I'm at odds with the world. My cycle (for up and down it goes) must be out of synch. Most of the time it's the world that seems to be enjoying sex and relationships whilst I struggle. I'm not complaining, just curious as to the timing.

Even my parents are in on the game. They want to introduce me to a girl from India for marriage. I was firmly against this, because I have an assumption that the kind of woman I want to marry can't be found in that vast continent with the second largest population in the world. I therefore modified my stance to say I'd marry any woman they found, no matter where from, providing:

1) She was not interested in material success.
2) She was her own woman with some inner strength and belief in herself.

At this point my father said that they won't be bothering to find me a woman because they don't think they could find a woman with such qualities. Like I said, it's only the second largest population in the world.

Actually, I suspect it's because both my parents want ME to be interested in material success, and they're probably not looking forward to a daughter-in-law with a mind of her own.

Perhaps I'm being too idealistic? A little too fussy in what I'm looking for? No, I don't think so. Right now I think N and K would meet these criteria.

The conversation with parents got very heated, and I was shouting towards the end. The automated quitting tip I got today said: "You might be feeling a little irritable, anxious, or tense for a few days after quitting."

No! Really?